Brandon had a near death experience caused by an waterskiing accident during his vacation in Antigua. When the paramedics came he was unconscious, not breathing, he had to be revived. The experience left him with a sense of urgency and desperation. After the accident he didn't care if his actions hurt others, he just did what he wanted, used who he wanted, said whatever he wanted whether true or not to get what he wanted because "fuck it" he thought, "you only live once and I'm not going to be left behind."
He was absolutely tyrannical.
Jordan loved Brandon anyway. His outlook on life was different than Brandon's. Jordan felt everything was already eternal and it was the way we processed this eternity that mattered... True freedom and choice being the ultimate illusion. He loved Brandon just as much as, if not more than, he disliked the way he behaved when scared even if he said otherwise, even if he thought he felt otherwise, his real feelings would eventually surface. But, he would never admit his love. Not unless Brandon let him know it was safe to do so. No such thing would ever happen.
